Once you cut through the layers of hype surrounding Microsoft’s latest boondoggle–er, product upgrade–what are you left with? An office suite with minor improvements. And all this can be yours for the bargain basement price of . . . $400 to $800 depending on which flavor you prefer. If you’re just upgrading, then the cost to you is a mere $200 to $500. I guess the “XP” stands for “eXPensive.” But wait: There’s more! Order now and you’ll also receive: A never-ending bill for your software through Microsoft’s .NET “software-as-a-service” plan, for which Office XP is the vanguard. Now how much would you pay? Don’t answer yet, because you’ll also get the privilege of Microsoft assuming you’re a criminal through their WPA (Windows Product Activation). First, Microsoft insists that you register, and they scan your PC to get a profile to associate with your XP. And if your PC crashes (but that never happens, right?), or you put in some new hardware and need to re-install too many times, then you have to call Microsoft and plead your case before you can re-install software for which you have paid. I guess “XP” stands for “eXtremely Pushy.” =)