RIAA Sues 12-Year-Old Girl, Pope, Orphanage, Puppy

“Just because someone appears to be ‘innocent,’ or ‘harmless’, or ‘physically incapable of using a computer,’ doesn’t mean that they’re not guilty of intellectual property theft,” said RIAA President George Shubb. “For example, our sources indicate that Randal Jenkins of Syracuse, New York, has illegally distributed over 10,000 songs, costing struggling musicians hundreds of thousands of dollars.” Jenkins, who is still a fetus, could not be reached for comment…